What Not To Do When You're Busted

By Keith Boykin, in pop culture
Tuesday, August 1 2006, 2:07PM

You could call it "Sunday in the park with George." This is how British pop star George Michael responded after allegedly being busted in a London park recently for having anonymous sex with a man described by the press as a "pot-bellied, 58-year-old, jobless van driver." Michael reportedly told the photographer who spotted him, "I'm not doing anything illegal. The police don't even come up here anymore. I'm a free man, I can do whatever I want. I'm not harming anyone." He then allegedly ran off. Later Michael announced that he planned to sue the man with whom he (never) had sex.

And this is how A-list Hollywood actor Mel Gibson responded to his recent arrest for driving under the influence of alcohol. "Fucking Jews," he yelled at the cops. "The Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world." Gibson said, before asking a police officer at the scene, "Are you a Jew?" He threw in a few other choice obscenities as well.

Tsk, tsk, tsk. These incidents show that it's time for another civics lesson on what not to do when you're busted.

What You Should And Should Not Do When You're Busted

The American Civil Liberties Union provides helpful information for people on what to do when you're arrested. The very first thing they tell you do is "think carefully about your words, movement, body language, and emotions," followed by "don't get into an argument with the police" and then "remember, anything you say or do can be used against you."

Mel Gibson should have followed that advice. Instead, he exploded into a hate-filled drunken rage that gave us a little more insight into the man behind "The Passion of The Christ." Mel probably doesn't listen to the ACLU. Too many Jews, I bet, for him. Maybe a better statement for Mel to remember how to act would be, "What would Jesus do?"

After a couple of days of horrid publicity, Gibson finally did the Christ-like thing and issued a statement through his agent on Tuesday. "There is no excuse, nor should there be any tolerance, for anyone who thinks or expresses any kind of anti-Semitic remark," he said. "I want to apologize specifically to everyone in the Jewish community for the vitriolic and harmful words that I said to a law enforcement officer the night I was arrested on a DUI charge."

Thanks Mel, but too little too late. You had it right with your first response. As you put it, "I'm fucked." Yeah, that's probably true.

The Right To Remain Silent

Here in this country, the Miranda rules give citizens the right to be quiet when busted by the police. The first thing the police tell you is this: "You have the right to remain silent." It's good advice. Too many people give up their rights when arrested, and that's rarely a smart thing to do. Instead, you should save your breath and save the arguments for court.

Maybe Mel and George and many others in Hollywood could take some advice from the king of celebrity cover-ups, Eddie Murphy. When Murphy was arrested in West Hollywood with a transvestite prostitute, he did what the Constitution gives him a right to do -- he shut up. And you haven't heard much about that incident since.

Comments (8) reveal