Herndon Davis: My Favorite Things

Waddie G.
December 5 2005, 4:42PM

He is a great I have chatted with online on occassion. I applaud his efforts

Frederick Smith
December 5 2005, 5:51PM

Herndon is great... and he's definitely about taking care of business. Great person to highlight today!
fs

Bklynbro
December 6 2005, 5:19PM

One to be admired, but yet unfortunate that he's one of those christian gay folk.

Laura
December 7 2005, 5:06PM

hey bklynbro, i don't think there's anything wrong with being gay and Christian, after all, where would we be without the gay Christian contribution to one of the world's most influential and widely imitated musical traditions (Gospel)?

it's just if they start frothing at the mouth and rolling in the aisles about how right their own preferred brand of Christianity is. at least Herndon Davis doesn't seem like one of those.

texas76132
December 8 2005, 3:00PM

There is nothing wrong with being being gay and Christian. I've never been one to be walk lock-step with any community, so I admire Herdon Davis and people like him. For years I let the hypocrisy of the church keep away and even question GOD. Fortunately I kept my spirituality which helps me deal with the wonders of life.

We have problems in the Black gay community. I think the females are doing better than us males - especially in the areas of friendships and maintaining long term relationships once the lust leaves. Herdon Davis is an alternative to the excess that's out there. His voice is much appreciated, at least by me.

One more thing. It's nice to see the renaissance of gay Black literature and the emphasis of education, class and culture. We will be better off in the next 30 years because we're tackling the issues holding us back. This is much different than the Black heterosexuals. We are their new scapegoat. They have always been less than accepting of us and somewhat disrespectful to us as Black gays and lesbians. Now they've jumped on the anti-gay bandwagon and blame us for everything. Some even have the audacity to tell us to seek help for our "problem" as if we have some kind of mental illness or something. The only thing that they can fault the Black gay male for is the spread of AIDS to Black women from men on the DL. (A very touch issue). Even that can't really be blamed on us because true gay men do not have sex with women, but we take responsibility for it anyway. Other than that, nothing else is our fault. The Black gay male is not responsible for the Black on Black crime ravaging communities thought Black America. It's the Black straight male, not us. Nor is the Black gay male responsible for contributing for the high out-of-wedlock births in the community which is dragging it down. Once again, it's the Black straight male and not us. I could go on and on, but you get the point. These bible thumpers in the straight Black community need to stop blaming us for all of their ills and address these problems or it will take them down in the next 30 years. And nobody wants that to happen. The black community, gay or straight, cannot continue to peddle smut in it's music, language, culture and move forward in a prosperous way. The Ghettolization of the Black culture since the early 80's is taking it's toll an we cannot survive another 30 years of this and come out ahead. I can remember when Black people wanted to get out of the ghetto. Now people want to be ghetto superstars and ghetto fabulous. How in the world did that happen? (Maybe it's people like Kanye West singing about life in the ghetto even though is a product of a middle class family and has never lived in the ghetto. It seems like pimping the Black community is the latest craze now. He puts out good music, but he is still selling a lie about his upbringing for dollars. He's not the only one doing it, just the first one to come to mind). What's with this "I wanna be a thug" and I"m a Homo-thug movement(don't get me started with that). Hey, this is America and you can be what you want. If you want to be ghetto-fabulous, a ghetto superstar, a thug, a homo-thug or whatever, more power to you. Just please don't complain when I move out of the neighborhood when you move in and turn it in to the hood. I want no part of that. No. I don't think I am better than anyone or holier than thou. I'm just an average Black man. Nothing special -and I ain't lying. I would never make it as a model. But I do have my standards and cliques just like you. And if you can live your life the way you want to and dare me to say anything about it , then so can I.

I plead guilty. I'm one of those Black people who move out of predominately Black neighborhoods, once the wanna be ghetto superstars/thugs move in and begin to move in and turn it into the latest and greatest hood. I make no apologies because I work too hard to live like that again. And besides,it's my right to pursue happiness any way I see fit. Many Blacks are much more cruel than I am when this happens. I've heard some pretty bad comments by our people about this. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but even that is changing.

Sorry for the rant. I Have no idea how I got off of subject like that. I just needed to say it. I'm not a judgmental person. I'm just giving a reason for the Black flight from the Black neighborhoods over the last two decades. Another hot issue. We've been pushed-out by crime and disrespect. Now we are the blame for the decline. Oh well. What's a person to do.

Laura
December 8 2005, 4:22PM

i agree with everything you said, Texas.

i got finished trying to apolgize for things out of my control -- like my parent's decision to move to the suburbs before i was born -- years ago. if they don't like it, f' em, i really cannot be bothered.

"Black Authenticity", Blacker-than-thou, narrow, essentialist "Blackness"; selective nationalism, loyalty baiting between anti-Black racist gays and homophobic Black heterosexuals, screw that. we don't have to play any of those games.

Laura
December 8 2005, 4:31PM

one more thing:

"Nor is the Black gay male responsible for contributing for the high out-of-wedlock births in the community which is dragging it down. Once again, it's the Black straight male and not us."

you can say that again.

they are also the ones running around making AIDS babies all over creation because they've been told they aren't real men if they're not sticking in and out of something every other day. but as typical heterosexual, irresponsible moral incompetents, they scapegoat gay men for that too.

well, them and their straight female counterparts who are no better, still believing that old claptrap that there is nothing lower than a woman without some penis with a checkbook on two legs, and something (e.g. a baby or an STD) to show for it.

texas76132
December 8 2005, 10:05PM

I am also done apologizing for things that I have not done or responsible for.

I've tried to do my good deeds with straight Black males but got burned twice this year. One of them had an ex-wife and a young girl. I got him and his friend, whom I have never met, a job with my employer at the time. The job was theirs. All they had to do was show-up to the interview and accept the job. They went there and acted a fool and were asked to leave the building or the cops would be called. These two fools got my instructions wrong and thought they were being mistreated and showed-out. Then there was the guy who I used to give rides to. He was putting stolen items in my car without telling me. I opened my trunk and saw the stuff. It was the last time he rode in my car. I'm more selective with the people I try to help.

I will only help you out as much as you want to help yourself. My new policy is "if you don't care about your situation, neither do I." I'm done being one of those Black people feeling guilty because I have a roof over my head. Don't get me wrong. I will always help someone in need, but the minute they get lazy and expect me do do things for them they should doing for themselves, I'm done with them. I have no intention of being the next Martin Luther King. I will not lose any sleep trying to help someone while they sit back and look at me like it's my responsibility to care for them. It's not happening.

Laura
December 8 2005, 11:44PM

well...anybody can do those kind of things, Black men don't do them any more than anyone else.

my problem is with these straight scum, who beat and rape, pay premiums to have unsafe sex, spread disease all over the planet, and then scapegoat gays for their own utter and complete lack of morals.

http://tinyurl.com/aa5jy

texas76132
December 9 2005, 9:17AM

Yes, you are correct. Anybody can do that. It's not just the Black man.

I single out the Black male because that's what I am. I'm not a racist or segregationist, but I could care less about what White male or any other male is doing. They have their own people and community groups working to keep them in check. They address their issues without caring what we think. Why can't we do the same. Nobody can determine our future better than us Blacks.

We have an ethical and more vacuum in Black America and there are a few church leaders who are screaming as loud as they can to get us Black people to look at the damage we are doing to ourselves. ( I hate it when I agree with them, but when they're right, they're right).

When I walk around town, I see many young Black children looking for leadership. Their grandparents are getting old and tired, and the teenage youth are helpless to do anything about it because they don't have the life experiences and resources to do deal with it. They are pleading for help from us who are adults. The age group between 30 and 50 is MIA (my opinion only). We are the first generation of Blacks slated not to outlive our parents because of diabetes, AIDS and other issues. Just ask any Black person in the health profession. They've known that for a while. In spite of that, the Black community is not as beaten down and hopeless as the media makes it seem. There are many bright spots.

I try to do what I can to help, but as a gay Black male. I keep my distance away from children because many parents in the Black community believe that gay people are child molesters, including members in my own family. They don't talk about gay people anymore since I told them I was gay. The homophobia in the community forced me to back off. I'm not going to let the people I'm trying to help gay bash me.

This is how Texas Blacks are doing:
In Killeen, Texas, (pop 90,000) the Koreans have taken over the Black male barber shops. There is not one Black male operated barbershop in that town any more. The women still own several beauty salons. The good thing is that even though the Koreans now have the male barbershops, Black men and women are becoming real estate agents and business owners. Their future in that town looks very good. Plus the Koreans to work with Black businesses and the relationship is good, so I'm not too concerned them . In Austin, the Asians are learning how too cook soul food. The Black community in East Austin will be gone in 20 years. Houston Tillotson College (historically Black) is getting a large influx of Hispanic students. It's just a matter of time before the Black college becomes Hispanic. The White people are running the Blacks and Hispanics out of east Austin because they're pushing land prices and taxes up. Most of the Blacks have moved to the suburbs. Many of them are doing quite well financially. Shame on them for giving up east Austin. The Waco Blacks (city pop 120,000) have the potential to do quite well in that county. The problem is a lack of leadership .The Black youth are moving out of town just like every other young person. The Waco mayor (Black female) recently died in office. Now Waco has a White female mayor who took her place. The Dallas Blacks. No hope for them. There is a contest to be the Blackest Black and its killing the community. If you are Black and you don't agree with them, you are an uncle Tom. You know the game. As soon as Blacks get a little bit of money in Dallas, they leave. The ultra hard Black leadership is running its own people out of town. Only the poor remain in South Dallas for the most part. Now the Black leadership is running radio ads to get Black people to move back Because other other ethnics groups are moving in. African Americans in Dallas have the lowest home ownership in the county (about 40%). No Comment on the Fort Worth and Houston Blacks. I don't know enough about them. The San Antonio Blacks. I don't hear any complaints about them and they seem to like the city. I've been there many times. The city is 70 percent Hispanic, but the Hispanics don't step on the Blacks. SA is a pretty nice town. I hope that's good info.

I stopped comparing myself to White people years ago and I feel much better because of it. Now if only the rest of Black America can do the same. We will do much better as a people once we stop worrying about what White people are doing.

Laura
December 9 2005, 6:00PM

"I try to do what I can to help, but as a gay Black male. I keep my distance away from children because many parents in the Black community believe that gay people are child molesters, including members in my own family. They don't talk about gay people anymore since I told them I was gay. The homophobia in the community forced me to back off. I'm not going to let the people I'm trying to help gay bash me."

i definitely hear that.

it's a control game they like to play; put you in a boxed-in, narrow role in the community, then call you whitewashed when you refuse to put up with it and leave.

OT1H they think we need them, when it's them that need us. at this point in my life, my community involvement is on my terms, and my terms only. individual heterosexuals are one issue, but as a general group they cannot be trusted to keep their lies-based lifestyle and hangups to themselves.

so f' em.

texas76132
December 10 2005, 9:09AM

Agreed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mel Smith
December 12 2005, 12:18AM

It's really unfortunate because I believe most anti gay folks are actually gay people who have low self esteem because they want to be straight. Therefore, they join heterosexists straight fools and attack people like themselves. Those people are real selfish cowards! I definitely agree with your views, Laura.